This year I will do everything in my power to look at my birthday in a positive way. I may be getting older, but that only means I am one step closer to the final destination; Heaven. I am one year closer to seeing Steven again. This must be difficult to understand for anyone who doesn't have someone special waiting for them to get there.
For those who are curious, I will be 24 this year. I have lived a lot of life in 24 years. In fact, I do not feel 24 at all. I feel 34. I'm not the same person that I was a year ago. I'm sure that girl is still inside of me somewhere, but she's been covered up with responsibility and disapointment. I have been forced to grow up; partially because of conscious choices I have made and partially because of my circumstances. In less than two years, Steven and I bought a house, moved in, got married, got pregnant, he died, and I was left to have a baby, alone. Being a single Mother was never part of my plan, but they say life is what happens while we are busy making plans. I have no regrets. I loved Steven as much as a woman can possibly love her husband and I was a good wife! Now, I will carry on and be a good Mother. This year, Steven has given me the ultimate gift. A gift that I could never give myself. A son.
So, tomorrow, I will wake up older. But, I will also wake up thankful.
"We have to be able to grow up. Our wrinkles are our medals of the passage of life. They are what we have been through and who we want to be." - Lauren Hutton
God Bless you and your son Caitlin. You are an inspiration to all.
ReplyDeleteYou encourage us to pick apart our lives and examine what really matters and what is really important. In the big picture it isn't money, a fancy house, a great job, expensive clothes, whatever else we think is important in life. All of those things can be replaced. The things that cannot be replaced are the ones we love. Unfortanutely some people do not realize that until it is too late. You, my dear, are much wiser than many much older than yourself, and you should be so very proud of yourself. You are such an inspiration to me and I know you are to so many other folks as well. Thank you for taking a situation so terrible and using it for the benefit of others. You never know the impact you have on the lives of others, and I truly believe you are impacting more lives than you know.
ReplyDelete